Have you been feeling lost lately in motherhood? Do you feel stressed and anxious all the time? Find out ways on how to stop feeling stressed and enjoy your motherhood journey instead.
How have all of you parents been handling the lockdown? With me and my husband both of us working full-time, and with a toddler at home to take care of and no help, things have been really getting crazy here. With the very start of the lockdown, I had started to notice that I was getting irritated all the time and feeling anxious throughout the day. With so much to get done in the day and no help, I am sure having meltdowns were unavoidable.
But something that I realized over the past few weeks is that these situations will keep arising all the time. Kids always have a way of shaking things up and not always everything will go as per plan, so why spend your energy fretting over every little thing that comes by!
The other day I had a ton of meetings at work, and all of them were from home. My husband had a crazy day too. In all this, I struggled to rush to the kitchen and make my daughter breakfast in the little time that I had. As soon as I set her plate, she started to cry for juice and disagreed to touch her food. And what followed from there was a cranky phase that she was in for a really long time and cried every time I left the room. It was a difficult day and finally somewhere in the middle of the day, I lost it and raised my voice at her.
Later that night, I felt very guilty for what I had done. Was it really right? After all she was only being a kid. Just because I have a ton of work to do, is it all right to get frustrated with her?
I don’t think so!
There will always be crazy days and I am sure many frustrating moments like these to come by as my daughter grows older, but the only thing that I can control at my end of the day is how I react to these situations!
Over the past few days, I have been trying a few things that has helped me control my breakdowns and handle stressful situations in a more controlled manner. These are simple things that I have been doing lately for myself, and that has surprisingly been keeping me in a good mood throughout the day!
I hope they work for you too and you are able to tackle your meltdowns and stop feeling stressed and anxious so that you can enjoy your motherhood all the more!
Related blog reads:
15 Simple habits of a happy mom
6 Ways on how I take care of myself
10 Tips to balance work and family as a mom
Tips to help you become a more patient mom
15 Time management mistakes moms are making and how to avoid them
Pin this post to keep it handy all the time!
6 Ways on how you can stop feeling stressed and enjoy your motherhood instead
1. Waking up an hour or two before my daughter
Somehow this little habit of mine has always made me feel very productive throughout the day, which makes me feel very satisfied and happy. I wake up at 5 AM every morning and I am able to get a ton of work done early in the morning before my daughter is up. There is something really strong about feeling in control of your time that can really lift your mood up.
Related: Why waking up before your child will change your life
2. Not all battles are to be won
Isn’t that so true when it comes to kids? A few days back, I was doing some crafts with Mishika when suddenly she wanted to take out each and every paint color to play with. I tried to tell her that it will get really messy but she wasn’t listening. And I don’t know if it’s the toddler two’s or what every struggle with her always ends with a downpour of tears.
Hearing her cry for a while was stressful and I actually thought that I was going to lose my mind. So I finally gave in. I gave her what she wanted. Was that good or bad parenting, honestly, I have no idea. At that time, all I really wanted to do was keep sane.
This made me realize that not all battles with your little one can be won. You have to pick and chose the struggles of which some will be non-negotiable and in some, you can be flexible with.
One of my non-negotiable struggles with my daughter was when we were playing outside, and it started to get a little windy. I insisted on her wearing a light jacket but she was nowhere ready to. I had to force her to wear it which felt like a big task but I did not give in. Eventually, she understood.
Kids will test your patience time and again! Instead of giving in to every whims and fancy of theirs or having meltdowns all the time, it is important to take a minute or two to breathe and then decide is it really worth winning this one or can you be flexible!
Related: How to raise happier kids
3. Let go of being in control
You may not always have everything go as per plan. You might get late to work sometimes or you might not be able to get that thing done today as your kid needs you more at that time and you might eventually have to move that task to the next day.
Whatever the thing is, not everything will be in your control when there are kids involved and the sooner you accept it, the better you will feel at tackling stressful situations the next time.
Related: 15 Healthy habits to teach your kids for a better life
4. Make self care a priority
I know sometimes with so much going around self-care sounds like an over-hyped word. But self-care never has to be anything big. It could be a few hours or even minutes a day that you spend with yourself doing the things you love which in turn will make you happy.
It could be simple things like spending some time gardening or cooking your favorite dish or watching your favorite TV series. For me it’s writing which makes me really happy. Every morning after waking up I spend a few hours writing when the house is the quietest and that makes me very happy throughout the day.
Pick what brings the most joy in your life and practice it for a few minutes in the day! You will start to notice a big difference in your life.
5. Plan your day
Honestly, you can never go wrong if you have a plan for the day. And isn’t it all the more required with the lockdown? My initial few meltdowns after the lockdown was because of not being able to get things done in time as there was no plan in place.
By the time I would have breakfast ready on the table, it would be time to start prepping for lunch which would eventually lead to missing outside playtime leaving my daughter really cranky. There were many situations like these that were stressful.
Eventually, I had to come up with a plan in place to make things run smoothly at home. For example, my husband would make the lunch while I take Mishka outside for a walk and I would make the dinner while he played outside with her in the evening. Slowly and slowly we started to get better at this and now things seem to work much better!
It is extremely important to have a plan in place but at the same time remember to not get too hung up on it as you can never control all the situations around you when kids are involved.
P.S. – Every night before going to bed I jot down my next day tasks using this planner which I usually keep on my bedside table. This simple habit helps me go to bed relaxed, knowing that I have an action plan for the next day and my mind is more composed with no mingled thoughts.
Related: Top 18 time management mistakes for busy moms
6. Surround yourself with positivity
Lastly and the most important thing, people you surround yourself with and the environment you are in greatly affects your mood. Having positive people and positive thoughts around you can greatly affect your mood and your actions.
Have you noticed that after you have watched a depressing movie, you tend to feel more gloomy and sad throughout the day? Or after you have come across a piece of terrible news, it just makes you feel worst?
Somehow for me the environment I am in, greatly effects my mood and hence off-lately I have been keeping myself away from negative thoughts and negative people.
I try to watch happy movies, keep away from bad social media and befriend negative people who somehow only see the worst in everything around them.
Surrounding yourself with positivity can bring a lot of happiness in your life which in turn can help you enjoy your motherhood more.
There are always going to be stressful and difficult situations in the near future. Instead of feeling stressed about all of them and ruining your day, take a few moments to look at the other side of the picture and look for things that can help improve the situation and not take it down. Trying to do small things for yourself and changing the way you react to situations can help you be in a happy mood and stop feeling stressed so that you can enjoy your motherhood journey all the more.
For all of you beautiful moms, I had come across this beautiful quote that just stuck with me really hard. Hopefully, it does the same magic for all of you too!
“You will never have this day with your children again. Tomorrow they’ll be a little older than they were today. This day is a gift. Just breathe, notice, study their faces and little feet. Pay attention. Relish the charms of the present. Enjoy today, it will be over before you know it.” – Jen Hatmaker
Leave A Comment